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January 15, 2007

Motorcycle Dating Site

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Previously deployed soldiers answer only please...?

When going through a year plus deployment do most of you change?

I have a 4 year relationship and a 2 year old son. We have had a okay relationship. Both quite bullheaded and stubborn but no major problems, he came home for mid tour break and everything was great. Than 2 months before he was to come home he started an online profile on a dating site claiming we were divorced etc.

He knows not once did I go out while he has been gone, I have been a hermit awaiting his return keeping up the home. He claims now he is not sure what he wants and doesn't know if he loves me and wants to be with me.

I am attracctive, fun, outgoing, ride a motorcycle, cook and clean, drama free so I am not the problem.

Do all you guys go through stuff like this, is there any hope. What should I do. I am starting to want to give up I am so hurt.

What I found regarding personal relationships is that, with deployment (or any long separation), whatever problems that were present before deployment (even if they seemed minor at the time) can be exacerbated, or problems that were likely going to happen, do in fact happen. I can't say that is exactly the case between you and your husband, but it sounds like it could be. He has had alot of time to think about things over there. I understand you have all sorts of attractive qualities, but this doesn't have so much to do with you as it does with him going through some sort of self-discovery and possibly finding out that he wants other things in life. I don't know whether he will "snap out of it" when he returns and realize he has a good thing with you. He may, but then again he may not. There are plenty of us who return from deployment and continue with our families in a rather normal fashion. Not all do though.

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